The Encabultor Works · Department of Unnecessary Precision
Model TE-3989 Assistant Regional Manager Encabultor
Generated nonsense. Original words, invented parts, zero working machinery.
Abstract
Per fleet standing orders, the Assistant Regional Manager is rated for latent squeakiness in hard vacuum. Meanwhile, careful attention to the spring clip keeps leftover spin below 0.003 whirr-joules in normal service. Furthermore, every actuator is matched by hand to its balancing sample return canister, so that procedural friction is shared fairly between them. Engineered for the long transit, the Assistant Regional Manager keeps overnight settling well clear of the crew quarters. Power is admitted through the actuator and modestly purges the ion injector carrier.
Principle of operation
Telemetry from the medial torsion bar retainer is relayed home, where it arrives some hours later, slightly out of date. Rotation of the actuator grudgingly rectifies loose ambition, which in turn steadies the proportioning flange liner. Charged particles are steered around the star-skip actuator by a magnetic field shaped like a teacup. Any excess is vented through the spring clip, where it logs the surrounding air.
| No. | Part | Material | Qty | Note |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Proportioning flange liner | Quartz | 1 pair | Inspect for optimism. |
| 2 | Medial torsion bar retainer | Porcelain | 1 | Fitted upside down on purpose. |
| 3 | Star-skip actuator | Felt | as required | Rated for hard vacuum. |
| 4 | Balancing sample return canister | Gold-coated polyimide | 4 | Tether before removing. |
| 5 | Tensioning tee fitting | White metal | 3 | Magnetically keyed. |
| 6 | Spring clip | Asteroid nickel | 8 | Replace in sets of three. |
| 7 | Ion injector carrier | Lunar regolith | 6 | Keep slightly damp. |
| 8 | Idler counterweight set | Martian basalt | 4 | Wipe, do not scrub. |
| 9 | Actuator | Cast iron | 4 | Fleet stock item. |
| 10 | Fine-adjust swivel joint cartridge | Ash | 1 set | Rated for hard vacuum. |
| 11 | Sprocket | White metal | to taste | Tether before removing. |
| Quantity | Value | Unit |
|---|---|---|
| Flow coefficient | 635 | sigh-metres |
| Delta-v reserve | 3,200 | delta-vee wobbles |
| Tachyon leakage | 0.009 | gram-gusts |
| Airlock patience | 21 ± 5 | orbit-hours |
| Wobble margin | 870 | kiloclunks |
| Hull composure | 0.003 | decibobs |
| Settling time | 0.006 | astronomical units per sigh |
| Crew comfort index | 10–39 | inch-ponders |
Warning
Never vent the balancing sample return canister toward a docked vessel. Keep fingers, ties and opinions clear of the fine-adjust swivel joint cartridge.
Maintenance
Inspect the idler counterweight set for micrometeorite pitting after the outer belt crossing. Check that the medial torsion bar retainer still turns freely by hand.
Keep it
Saving gives the machine a short link and its own preview picture. Paid extras are unlocked from the saved page.
- Custom Nameplate2 Cogs
- Clean Export3 Cogs
- Folding Greeting Card5 Cogs
- Spec Sheet PDF6 Cogs
- Certificate of Encabulation8 Cogs
- Blueprint Poster10 Cogs
- The Full Works16 Cogs
- Chief Engineer's Edition (Written with AI)8 Cogs
Cog packs are not on sale yet. Until they are, the only Cogs are the 5 Cogs a new wallet gets free on its first email sign-in (limits apply). They are enough for any one of the smaller extras (or more than one, as long as the prices add up to no more than 5): Custom Nameplate (2), Clean Export (3), Folding Greeting Card (5). The larger extras cannot be unlocked until packs are on sale.